Finding Your Tribe of Women

Female solidarity. An incredibly powerful and important thing that we all need in this patriarchal world that we continue to live in. Yet, there is so little representation of the same in books, on television, or in the movies. 

I have had the privilege of experiencing strong female solidarity which I owe to some incredibly talented, kind, and generous women I am lucky to call friends and acquaintances. From dissecting female portrayals in movies to ranting about sexism in public places, they are always there to lend me an ear. They are proof that the oft repeated “Women cannot be friends” belief is nothing but a myth. Which is why I love Sex Education’s Episode 7 from Season 2. 

I re-watched that episode today and powerful emotions hit me all over again, leaving me almost as teary eyed as I was the first time I watched it. The series follows a bunch of high school students in Britain who are discovering their own desires, sexualities, and understanding their bodies while also getting to know agency and decision-making. In this particular episode, six very different girls find themselves in detention and are asked to find out what binds them together as women. These girls, who don’t particularly get along with each other, struggle to find some common ground and come up with nothing (yes, not all women like shopping or chocolates). This goes on till one girl, Aimee, who had recently experienced sexual assault on a bus opens up about how she fears taking the bus after that incident. This leads to the other girls opening up about their own experiences of sexual assault in various public places from train stations and online platforms to swimming pools and roads. The episode ends with all the girls helping Aimee get onto the bus, telling her, “It’s just a stupid bus”. Six extremely different girls, with not much in common or even a liking for each other, helping a fellow woman deal with her fears, standing in solidarity with her and empathising – this is what real representation looks like. 

Every day, I know there are women I can turn to when I don’t know something to do with my work. I know I can discuss sexism or patriarchal practices that annoy me in public and private places with female friends who are always ready to listen to me and share their experiences. I know friends who offer a safe space for me and for whom I would do the same in the blink of an eye. We all help each other, comfort each other, and try to make each other’s lives a little bit easier even as we navigate the sexism and patriarchy inherent in everyday space, regardless of how far we have come as a society in the last few years. Female solidarity is, in reality, more a norm than an exception.