The End or The Beginning?

I looked at my friend chatting with me

A fake smile on my face in that wee hour.

My mind was elsewhere,

Eyes filled with unshed tears.

'Why me?', I wondered

God's direction of thoughts left me bewildered.

A chauffeur waiting for me outside,

A palatial house to go to.

And yet,

my heart was empty as a hole.

Two days. They changed my life

for the worse.

He said he had other commitments

Success, was the only thing he was after.

Stunned, I looked at him silently,

Had insanity struck me? 

Four years of hearing his silken voice,

Laughing away my fears with him,

Crying into his shoulder

And walking silently beside him.

He gave me reassurances,

Believed in me when I myself didn't.

Words of encouragement,

Used to fill me with courage.

A smile from him

Was all it took to brighten my day.

Times when he was away

Filled me with longing

Which all vanished

At one sight of him.

I won't lie and say,

Our love was perfect

We had our indifferences

Squabbles and misunderstandings,

were all part of it.

But these, were what brought us even closer,

If such a thing were even possible.

That his aim was to taste success

Was something I knew

But the fact that en route to his

Accomplishment of that dream

He would leave me behind,

Alone in the journey of life,

Was something even my worst nightmares,

Hadn't warned me of.

Seated in my car,

I was looking out at the hazy window.

The sky too, was mourning for me,

I realized through my tear-stained eyes

Good Lord. Take away my pain. 

No sin, however big,

Could have earned me this heartbreak! 

I looked at the setting sun,

And slowly, my heart filled with determination

The self-confidence which had deserted me for so long

Engulfed me now.

This whole thing had after all,

Been for my betterment.

Because, I now knew, he neither deserved me

Nor my love.